Notes for freshers trying to get a job in IT

There is a recession and the market is bad for freshers trying to enter the software industry. Graduates who were offered jobs in campus interviews have been asked to wait by companies. Companies have dropped out of campus interviews for this year. I know that last year many freshers who were being trained were laid off (almost the entire batch in my last company).
Things are looking bad for people looking into stepping into the software industry for the first time. On the other hand, if you have a couple of years of software experience, things do not look so bad - companies still are recruting people with minimal experience.
In this post, I will try to give some advice on how to tide across these times. I will follow it up with a primer for freshers about the workings of an IT corporation and career paths.

My Credentials
I was a VP in a medium sized company for some time. Among other responsibilities I was one of the primary trainers for incoming freshers. I set up syllabus for such training, and also evaluated freshers regularly. I have been an interviewer on campus a few times. I have also evaluated computer training companies for outsourcing our training.

Why do Freshers fare worse in a recession?
Let us say I am running an IT company. I have projects coming in "pipelines". I have a set of current projects and they may be expanding or closing down. These projects may be in different technologies (such as Java, .NET) and therefore moving people around in these may be a problem.
An IT company constantly faces manpower issues. People tell us that the main reason is "employee turnover". That is, employees keep leaving companies in search of better jobs. But that is a small part of the problem.
Unlike manufacturing companies, software work cannot be transferred easily from one person to another. In manufacturing companies, producing a piece of a product (such as a telephone) takes the same amount of work for each telephone. Reproducing each product the same way is the main focus in manufacturing. Thus there is lots of manual, repetitive work.
But in a software company, reproducing a software or packaging it in a CD is trivial. It does not take any effort. The main problem in software is CREATING it according to specs.
Thus the avreage worker in IT needs to be much more qualified and intelligent than the average worker in other industries.
So, when a new project comes in, finding the RIGHT person for a role in that project is a big pain in software. Even if you have ten people sitting in bench, it may be difficult finding the right person.
I as an IT company owner, find staffing and recruitment difficult. I decide that I may run my business more profitably if I found smart people from college. The college already has a built in evaluation system, so I depend on that system to find smart people.
In India, seeking computer science engineers alone does not help me. A person passing as a computer science engineer, with high marks, still may have NO idea about what a company needs right away. I will come to this later, but that is the nature of the university degrees here. Particularly in computers. It is not so bad in electronics or in automobile industry. I joined an electronics company when I passed out of college. I got no training, but I was productive in two days, fixing circuit boards. That does not happen with software so much.
So companies end up seeking college grads, and then training them for two to three months. For an actual productive work, it takes upto 6 months of hand holding for a fresher - even if they are from a computer science background.
But companies still do it, because they can justify the costs. Freshers are likely to stay longer in a company. They are also paid less. And they are less dmeanding from the company. There are several advantages to investing in freshers.
But they all disappear in a recession - because the lack of projects and mass layoffs flood the market. All of the above advantages now also apply to experienced engineers in a recession. So, companies end up not recruting freshers.

Training Courses and Certifications
There are different modes in which companies recruit outside campus. They have walkins. They have a referral system - so if you know someone's friend, it helps (nothing wrong with that).
Meanwhile, you are sitting at home, trying to decide your next course of action. Your parents are worried and they want you to do something to get a job.
In this situation, I see many freshers take a standrad approach - they join computer courses to learn more. They write certifications or other exams.
My opinion is that these are useless. I can tell you right away that computer courses have ZERO value for a recruiter. In my opinion they are a waste of money.
So are certifications, unless you actually use that as an opportunity to learn. The certification that a fresher shows is simply a way for recruiters to ask questions in that direction. The certificate itself has no value.
I have evaluated software training companies to determine if we can outsource training from my last company. I interviewed people from some premium training companies. The trainers had NO idea about technology. They themselves had no grasp of concepts - they needed training themselves.
There are three types of training companies:
1. Top-tier like NIIT - In my opinion, these are bad too. But they may have some value because they have placement services. But they are costly.
2. Second tier - these guys want to be NIIT but they are really really bad. They are affected by the lack of good trainers.
3. Third grade scamsters - these guys will promise a job and have other scams up their sleeves. They are evil - stay away from them.
My advice is, do not spend money on computer training courses. Recruiters do not respect them. In fact there are people who even disrespect if you went to NIIT. If you have an engineering degree or an MCA, they are of much more value than computer training certs.

Self-Learning
In times of recession, as I explained above, companies are not going to train you. They want someone they can put on a project and can be productive in atleast a week.
If you can prove that you can do that, you can get a job.
Let us assume there are walk-ins or you get a referral through a someone you know. The aptitude test part of it is over and you are about to face an interview. Let me tell you what I would like from a fresher.
I would like him/her NOT to be a fresher. (From now on we will assume the fresher is a female).

Seriously, I would look for proof of the following (much of this assumes a web development project):
1. She should know HTML, CSS and Javascript - no excuses. When I say HTML, I don't mean creating a list with a marquee flowing on top. Do NOT list plain HTML in your resume, without including CSS and Javascript. And learn CSS and Javascript.
Your BEST hope as a fresher is to know HTML, Javascript, CSS, and then ASP.NET or JSP or PHP. That is the correct combination for an entry level position without training.
2. That she knows a language such as Java, C#, Visual Basic .NET or PHP. It is not acceptable to say you know C or C++. You are unlikely to get a job with C or C++. Don't even list C in your resume if you know one of the other languages.
3. That she has worked in a project that makes "business sense". Address Book is NOT a project we like to hear. Instead if you said you worked in creating a website for you college library, it is slightly better. If you had created a web application for managing your syllabus and project work at college, still better. If you had actually built a website for someone's electronic store, you are ideal.
That means you understand the complexity of a actual web application. Hopefully all that you are saying can be justified when the recruiter further questions you.

Employable Skills
As a fresher, your job is to learn employable skills. I mentioned above the knowledge that can get you a job. Let me break it down a little bit more below. Again, I am talking about a company mostly performing web or desktop development - not writing embedded software.
1. You should be familiar with an editor such as Eclipse, Netbeans or Visual Studio.NET. Eclipse is the best bet. It is also free.
2. Given a photoshop layout of a webpage, you should be able to lay it out in HTML. This is a key skill. It requires lots of work to learn.
3. You should be able to write a simple "Register" form and save it to the database in any platform such as .NET, Java or PHP. You don't need to know all of them - just one platform is fine.
4. You should know standard algorithms such as reversing a string or sorting a list in either Java, C#, VB.NET. I do not like to ask these myself, but people still ask these questions.
5. You should know how the web works - cookies, query strings, going from one page to another (redirects), session state and other ideas.
6. You should know how to design a couple of database tables with foreign key relations (normalization).
7. You should know basic SQL. Inserts, selects, updates, deletes and joins.
8. Try to know what source control or version controling system is. Knowing the concept or having someone demo it to you is enough.
9. You should be able to create "reusable" controls in ASP.NET or JSP or PHP.
10. You should know how to "validate" a form on the client side - making sure phone numbers are correct etc.

How do I gain these skills?
Here is my advice on how you can go about building these skills:
If you are in college or just out of college, prepare to do some learning of your own. Forget about computer courses and certifications. I will give you a small path for learning PHP. You need a computer at home or a friend's home.
1. Buy a book. You have to learn some things from books, no other way. Spend money and buy the Wrox press book "Apache, PHP and MYSQL".
2. Follow the instructions in the book to download Apache, PHP and MySQL and install them separately.
3. Follow the few examples in the book and build simple web pages.
4. Take a website you like. Choose a simple page in that site. It can be a complaint page or a contact us page. Even use my website http://www.alphazonsystems.com. When you view it, the images will be downloaded to your computer. Take them and use HTML and CSS to build the exact same page as it looks on your browser. Try this in IE and Firefox.
5. I think there is a Wrox press book called HTML, Javascript and CSS. Buy it and use it to learn CSS and Javascript.

After these steps, try to do a couple of simple projects - one is the famous Address Book. Others should be more complicated, such as a bookstore.
My point is this - if you have computer access, then get a couple of books and SELF-LEARN. There are numerous resources in the internet to help you learn programming. If you face a problem such as "How do I restart Apache?" just search in Google and you will find hundreds of pages.
Remember when you learnt how the television works in school? After that whenever you looked at a television you can understand how it works. Understanding websites is like that. Once you build a couple yourself, you can understand how any webaite works. Take a look at Google. Try to figure out how it works. How does Yahoo mail or gmail work? It is easy to figure this out from the bookstore example, believe me.
If you walked into an interview with the above skills under your belt and listed in your resume, it is likely you will get a job.

Myths on Careers

My nephew is doing post-grad in Aerospace. We were recently chatting, when he said that from the age of five, Astronomy had been his dream and he wanted to be an astronaut all his life.
I was somewhat skeptical - you see, I knew him from the time he was a baby. He does not even own a telescope at home (they can afford it). I have never heard him talking about astronomy; nor seen him read books related to that subject.
I think my nephew was falling into a trap laid by popular culture - which is the idea that people have "dreams" about their careers from very early in life and that they should "follow their dreams".
I know the message sounds all optimistic - but it makes no practical sense. Yet, in advertisements, Disney movies and media we find this meme - that we all have some kind of destiny and that we should strive to fulfill it.

Can We Decide When Young?2.
Increasingly, we are also told that we have to decide our careers very early in life. This is a repeated theme in Hollywood movies. Our advertisements nakedly exploit this - with children spouting lines about becoming a pilot or a computer programmer.
The idea that we have talents, I agree with. But those talents are more at the abstract level - it is impossible to decide very early on in life if you are going to be a computer programmer. Just as you cannot decide if you are going to be a lawyer or an auditor or an archaeologist.
At some level we all understand this when it comes to a career like law or accounting. But when it comes to "engineering" and other such romantic careers, we are told that we should "dream" and "follow our dreams".
There is an effort to make us believe that our dreams as children matter. I think that effort is simply putting more pressure on parents and children - on parents to "discover" their kid's talents very early on; and for children to decide their talents early and then stick to it, even though they may be completely wrong about it.
In one way, this is the age old game of trying to maintain a competitive advantage in our society - it has nothing to do with dreams or following those dreams.

The Truth about Career Dreams
The truth is this: most people decide their career based on financial reasons. This is true both in India and abroad. I know plenty of American programmers who are from finance, medicine, chemistry and other backgrounds. There is NOTHING wrong with deciding your career based on financial considerations.
Let us say, in spite of this, that we should follow our dreams. The question is, practically, for the majority of the population, at what point would you even know what your "dream" career is.
This is why I believe popular culture is sending the wrong message. I think it takes a long time, even into adulthood before you can understand what you are REALLY good at. And that is fine. Most people will end up working on something we are average at. That is fine too.
One of my cousins said she decided to be in the media very early on in life. Maybe. Did she even know what role she would play in the media? Doubtful. I mean, media includes roles from project management, production design, writing to several on-stage and off-stage roles. I think, instead, she decided to specialize in media when she entered adulthood, but then re-invented her passion for it and projected it to her childhood.

My Career
When I was in fifth standard I wanted to be an archaeologist. Then I wanted to be an astronomer, bus driver, wandering sanyasi, temple poojari, writer, reader (if someone would pay for it) and countless other professions.
It is obvious that I had no idea what a "profession" meant. I did have a talent for writing. But it was not very well-honed then.
Now, it would be absurd for me to say that I wanted to be in computers from when I was young. Why? Because I did not know what a computer was till my second year in college.
A bunch of my classmates were studying in NIIT at that time. Me and some friends were into Physics. We thought the guys studying computers were betraying Physics. We wouldn't talk to them.
This hatred for computers continued into engineering college. When it was time to choose what jobs we were interested in, I chose Elecronics and then Communications. I did not select computer software as a campus interview choice.
Then in my final year in engineering college, I realized something fundamental - I was an Electronics engineer, but I could not even solder two wires together. In fact, I sucked at building anything using electronics. Some of my classmates were building their own transistor radios and even micro computers. But I was a "theoretical electronics" guy.
This inability to handle anything mechanical must be an inherited bug in my genes. But as luck would have it, this bug pushed me into software.
When we had to choose our final year project, I had two choices. One was building some kind of electronic triggering system for cars or something. The other was a "simulation" project in which I had to program a communication system in a computer.
Since I knew that if I created any electronice triggering system, it would likely blow up when the car started, I decided to go for the simulation project.
Well, 15 years later, I am still programming.
Do I like it? Of course. I am free to make and break things while building them - without any cost consequences (atleast not compared to the real world). I like what I am doing.
But it took me many years to like it.
My point is that my story is far more typical. Getting a job you like is rare. The idea that you can "dream" about a specific career when you are young is just a myth. It takes well into adulthood to figure out what we like and why we like it.

Speaking "Indian" at work and public

When the Australian race attacks happened, as I noted here, commenters said that Austalians did not like Indians talking in their native languages in public.
In India itself, there is an uniquely Indian aspect to this controversy that refuses to die. This post is about that controversy and what it means for our society.

The Stereotype
When I left for the United States back in 1999, one of my HR briefers in India told me not to talk in Tamil at work. At that time I did not question that. I just accepted it.
In the States, some of my colleagues were from North India, and we fell into the habit of talking in Hindi when together(I learnt Hindi from them).
But I was surprised that in the online forums and chatrooms there was always an accusation that if a group of people speaking Indian language X got together they were very rude and continued to speak in language X at work (where X could be Tamil, Telugu, Hindi or Malayalam). That is, almost every Indian group was accusing other groups of talking in their own language at work.
When I came back to India I myself had an argument with a drunk guy who made the general accusation at Tamil speakers and I wrote about that here.
It was obvious to me, then, that like several other derogatory stereotypes about the diferent ethnic groups (such as North Indians smell or South Indians speak bad English), this was simply another stereotype. No particular ethnic group "uniquely" misbehaved at work and nor was any other ethnic group "well-behaved". Just as Telugu people are unfairly accused of faking resumes (everyone does it; it is a competitive country) similarly the stereotype is that when a bunch of Tamils or Bengalis get together at work, they talk in their native languages.
But stereotypes have consequences.

The English-Only company
Recently a company I know passed a HR "policy" that all conversations other than water-cooler types or at lunch time, should be in English. I have no idea how they would implement this in practice, without imposing a kinder-garten like atmosphere. But this post is not about that.
The question I have is this. Who decided that talking in your native language among other people who speak that same language is somehow "rude"?
India has 200 different languages and within every three or four hundred kilometers you encounter a new language. When we were growing up, there were people speaking different languages all around us. And this is definitely true in this day.
When you went to public places or in school, you always came across people who speak in different languages among themselves. It never "offended" anybody.
On the other hand countries like America and Australia have a "melting-pot" metaphor. In these countries racism takes different forms - ONE of those forms is the anger against people speaking in different languages among themselves.
That is, the INTOLERANCE that Americans, the British or Australians show to linguistic diversity is not a GOOD feature of their society. It is actually profoundly insensitive and xenophobic.
My point is that we have taken this remarkably stupid insensitivity and then tried to develop the same insensitivity in INDIA - which is against any common sense. This is a country which should be celebrating linguistic diversity. Instead, the modern Indian at work and in public is encouraged to frown on people speaking a different language among themselves. Why? Because they do so in the West.
So, now we have people turning up their collective noses when a few developers talk in Tamil or Telugu or Hindi.
What is the result? As I explained in this post, it is not as if we are all trained by super English teachers. Most of us talk bad English anyway. So we end up talking butler English at work just to prove someone's point and power.

PS:
If you are in a meeting and a bunch of people are talking in a language you don't know, then why not simply let them know you don't know the language? Why is that such a bad option?

Is the USA headed for civil war?

I wanted to get this out first.
Last year there was some commotion around the prediction of a Russian politician that the USA was headed for civil war. At that time the Sarah Palin nomination (as VP candidate for the Republican Party) had just split the country into unbelieving independents and democrats on the one side; and a fired up "conservative" base of Evangelicals and neo-conservatives. Still almost every commentator dismissed the civil war prediction as too far-fetched.
Fast-forward to this year - post the Obama inauguration, the Republican party and its base have been getting crazier and crazier. Unhinged is too mild a word for these lunatics. For any neutral observer, this is the current situation:
1. An array of right-wing pundits such as Rush Limbaugh(radio), Glenn Beck (Fox) and Bill O'Reilly (Fox) have been equating Obama's administration with the Nazis and have been talking about "driving a stake through the heart" of the admin. They have been calling any policy move by Obama and the progressive Democrats as "tyranny" and "socialism".
Any intelligent debate has been cancelled out by applying terms such as socialism and Marxism to policies such as healthcare. Right now, there is neither an attempt to debate nor any interest by the entire right-wing intelligentsia.
2. A set of "astro-turf" groups calling themselves Tea-baggers have become a channel for expressing incredible racism and anger against the democrats and Obama in particular. These groups have shown zero understanding of policy issues, but scream "tyranny" and "socialism" against a legitimately elected government.
3. Another group of people called the "Birthers" have been expressing the conspiracy theory that Obama is a Manchurian candidate and that he is not an American citizen. Apparently more than 60% of Republicans believe that the current President of the USA is not a citizen of the uSA and therefore consider his election illegitimate.
4. What is more shocking is that the Republican Party leadership falls in line with their party's most lunatic fringe. They show no interest in contradicting or controlling these conspiracy theories.
5. At present the Republican Party has the lowest approval rating in history. It has beocme a party of the American South, and has become a refuge for racists, white supremacists and Christian fundamentalists.
6. One of the starkest battles going on right now is the healthcare debate. The "public option" proposed by the progressives is neither out-of-the-world, nor is it socialism. The Democratic congressmen have been organizing town hall meetings to discuss the healthcare reform bill. Right-wing thugs such as Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh and a few Republican operatives have sought to disrupt these townhalls with screaming mobs who are not even there to discuss policy.

Right now, it seems the Republican party has been taken over by its ultra-right fringe. There have been several instances of lone gunmen shooting and killing innocent people since the election.
Both the deeply racist and fundamentalist crowds seem to have come together mainly because the Republican leadership is lost. At this point, particularly after the town hall meetings fiasco, it is obvious that the right-wing is taking more and more steps to push their agenda by fascist, violent means.
Thus, they consider the current president illegitimate for reasons of race; and because of a conspiracy theory that he was not born in the USA. They think Obama is a secret Marxist. They think the government is engaging in tyranny and have been advocating revolution.
At this point a civil war breaking out does not seem remote. I think we will see more acts of violence and more incitement to violence by right-wing leaders and their followers.

A Profile of Eve Teasers

When I was living in Nungambakkam, around 1992, an incident happened in the road behind our house. A college girl was driving a scooter. Two guys saw her driving and decided to harass her. They drove near her and kept aggressively pushing her off the road. At one point, the girl lost balance and fell down. A passing bus hit and crushed her.
The guys were nowhere to be found and I am guessing nobody got caught.
This incident was one of the earliest incidents of "eve-teasing" (a very benign term describing a horrible murderous affliction in Indian cities) that burst into news. It was following this incident and the death of another girl near Ethiraj college that police started deploying women's brigades in plain clothes. Every year brought its own outrages - including the incident at Satyam theater a few years back - the daughter of an army officer was hit repeatedly in full public view; an intervening police man beaten up. In that incident the girl's family decided to drop all charges because the guy involved was a politician's son.
The problem of eve-teasing, is, of course, not specific to Chennai. Jammu and Delhi are said to be the worst in India.
Now, our society has dealt with this problem in different ways - the usual suspects have shown up and blamed the women themselves. Police, in their typical clueless way started harassing lovers sitting in parks and beaches. All these are known.
What is also known is that "star" dumb asses such as actors Vijay and Surya started justifying and promoting violence against women in their movies. They have hidden behind the usual excuse of "oh, the story writer wrote it - I just acted in the movie" while taking all praise and money for "their" movie successes. Whether movies influence society or it is the other way around is a separate topic. But there is no doubt that these guys tried to make money by appealing to chauvinism in "their" fans. I also have no doubt that the classic Indian rich guy defense of "I-can-do-anything-for-money" will be taken by these star clowns. I sometimes wish for militant feminism so that women chase these guys down the road with chappals and broomsticks.
Before I go on to the main purpose of this post, please take your time and read through the Blank Noise website. It has some of the most moving accounts of the victims of eveteasing. They are also trying to get something done about it. All help to them.

The Profiles of Eve-Teasers
You see, when I was in high school at Madurai, I had a few friends with whom I used to hang out. Generally we used to commute to school together. Some of these guys were interested in "eve-teasing". Because we were in the same class, I knew a lot about them.
I again came in contact with such guys in Chennai when I was in college.
In our media, just as "terrorist" (Theeviravaadhi) has become a term without any meaning, eve-teasing also has becme detached from the actual meaning. For example, an eve-teaser is treated as if he is a separate species (like a terrorist in a Vijaykanth movie). The true motives and psychology of such a person is not probed. This allows movie stars to harass women in their movies but at the same time punish "eve-teasers". The hypocrisy does not bother them. If a "good" guy, with "love" in his mind harasses "his" woman that is fine. It is just not proper for those eve-teaser bastards to do it.
In my contact with classmates and neighborhood little guys who engaged in eve-teasing, this is what I found:
1. First of all, the eve-teaser was extremely afraid of his parents. All these brave guys who whistle at women and yell at them - they usually had a father who would beat them in circles OUTSIDE their homes if the fathers found out what was going on.
2. The eve-teaser did not like to be alone. He was at his bravest when there were 10 big guys around him from his own college or school to protect him. If there were a lot of people, he would scream, whistle and "have fun". Instead if he was alone, all his bravery left him. He would sneak around with eyes averted. His courage comes from anonymity and the mob.
This is why you see guys who yell at women from a passing bus or motorbike.
3. What the eve-teaser values (from my observation and hindsight) is not really feminine contact. He values two things:
a. He wants desperately to be respected by his friends. His self-worth springs from his friends' approval. This is probably because his parents have not given enough self-worth to him. The female, in this case, is simply a tool - she is the best shortcut to win approval from his friends. Movies get this completely wrong - a guy who loves a woman does not go about whistling at her in public. In most cases, the eve-teaser's hope is to do something dangerous and win approval from his gang-brothers.
There were guys among my classmates who would dream up something new to impress friends every day. They would cackle loudly in public without having said anything remotely funny. In short, they were pathetic.
b. The second thing, in order, that some of them have, is a fear of women. It is hard to explain this - our society being very conservative, kids are brought up in boys-only or girls-only schools and colleges. For these guys (not all of them), women are a completely scary mystery. They get annoyed by women behaving normally in public places - somehow they see an unconnected woman laughing at a joke in a busstand as a threat to themselves.
I don't know what causes this great insecurity - but it is tragic for the guys and for the women who end up getting harassed.
I have seen some of my classmates show anger at something as simple as a woman walking confidently. It is an extreme resentment.
Again, this has nothing to do with the women themselves. Most of the time they are unaware that they are provoking this resentment just by being themselves.

Thus you see that BOTH the reasons why guys indulge in eve-teasing have little to do with sex, love or with the women's dress (as some magazines keep insinuating). It has to do with the inner demons in a teen-aged or even adult man in our society. It is very much a psychological issue.
Thus this problem can never be solved by compartmentalizing men and women further. In fact eve-teasing has somewhat gone down recently in Chennai mainly because men and women are working together more and more.
The only way to solve it is through education, particularly sex-education, and encouraging co-education schools. The more you are self-aware, the less you would engage in a mob-activity.

4. Now, from the above description, it may seem that the eve-teaser is a pathetic little guy. But we hear all the time (as in the Satyam complex incident) about powerful politicians' sons engaging in this "sport". How do we explain that?
From my observation, I would say 95% of guys who engage in eve-teasing have NO political or any other connection. What they are HOPING though, is that you would THINK they had such connections. As I said, a single call to one of their fathers would have them crapping in their pants.
But their approach seems to work. A couple of years back, my wife beat the hell out of a guy in a Chennai road. When we were narrating this to a woman colleague, she said, "what if he had come back with some goons?". This happens only in movies. Almost all the time the eve-teaser has no support from anyone. He is hoping that you would be scared of him, thinking he has political connections. But he has none.

5. What movies provide in the case of eve-teasing, is not (as some people think) a direct encouragement. By showing women in a belittled fashion and spouting comments about women's dresses, what "actors" like Vijay and Surya provide is a MORAL justification for guys who may feel squeamish about it. What they provide is a moral framework in which a random person can assault a woman and harass her. Eve-teasing will not stop if these movie actors stopped doing it - but at least society will not have to engage in these stupid arguments about women's dresses in a problem that has nothing to do with women.

Again, this problem is not going to go away with deterrence or punishment. It needs a systemic approach.

Notes to my new-born son

Welcome to the world. I thought I may as well let you know a few things about myself and this planet, in that order. It may help you understand me better, but it also makes for a good blog.
First of all, your father was not a genius growing up. This is important - because you may see my current IQ level and may conclude that your father has always been the smartest man on earth. This is not so - I had great difficulty crossing 50 marks in mathematics all through secondary school.
Nor was your father so ultra-cool growing up. It is hard to be ultra-cool when you are forced to wear "drawers" till 10th std. It leaves a scar all through your life.
How do I explain, then, the current super-coolness and super-smartness that I radiate on my person?
The answer is simple - coolness and smartness automatically are thrust on you when you cross 35. This is because no one expects you to be cool when you are 35.
So, the first lesson of life is this - do not worry about iPODs;or the latest mobile phone models. You will be cool when you are 35 and the coolness then grows with every year (along with your irritation factor).

You mayask what motivates your father's political views. I was a community organizer at 4th std. It is TRUE that I organized my fellow classmates, particularly the boys, against the tyranny of the class leader, Sri Vidhya. At one point, as a mark of protest, I wrote "Sri Vidhya Down Down" all over the blackboard. This shows that I was willing to seek peaceful means of disapproval.
Unfortunately, the teacher did not see it that way - she used violent means such as thrashing the hell out of me; and other forms of initimidation. I had to give up my protest at that point, but it was a strategic retreat.
There is no doubt that it was this early exposure to state power that has made me radical and still helps me protest injustice in peaceful ways. I consider myself a modern day Che Guevara, ever ready to protest the tyranny of class leaders and project managers. I fiercely fight entrenched interests by writing anonymous blogs.

Your father was interested in literature from the time he was in 5th std. One of his earliest poems (written in a fit of literary excitement) was this:
Nature
------
Today, one who is in sorrow
Comes to me tomorrow

I had the word "tomorrow" and then spent two hours searching for a rhyming word. Then I chose the title and the subject.
Poetry IS that simple. Start with a word and then find rhyming words. It is like a game.
I also was influenced heavily by the writer Sujatha. At one point I wrote a really complex detective story in which, just from some water near a dead body, the detective figures out that there is a giant conspiracy to overturn India's elected government. What really helped the detective was that I, the writer, knew exactly what happened.
Writing stories and poems is a family tradition - I want you to continue it. Do not worry about publishing them. Nobody would publish them anyway. We have something called the internet. We can always publish there.

The other art your father is very good at is singing. Our neighbors may not agree, but I sacrificed my whole childhood in singing practice. I am not going to rest until I get acknowledged as a good singer. If I can't, it is your turn - I am willing to sacrifice your childhood for the same purpose.
Unfortunately, the whole idea of "rhythm" is not helping me. I don't know why drums or mridangam have to start playing at the same time I am singing. I have tried to signal them to stop but it is of no use.
At least, I want you to be in the college orchestra or music troupe. I never succeeded in this. They always gave me really weird songs to sing. Such as the songs sung in movies by blind beggars or by drunk vagabonds. Maybe you can improve this situation.

What is your father's profession? What does he DO? How does he earn money?
Long before your father was born, someone discovered the software project manager. Then they invented the computer because the project manager wanted to manage something.
Technology stagnated at this point until someone found that Indians could write software programs for computers. Once they found that, a half a billion Indians jumped up and started learning the C language.
Your father was one of them.
Now, I know that you see your father pottering around the house ALL the time and never see him leave the house and go to "work" like other fathers. You may be wondering where the money comes from. You may be worried about your future purchases such as train toys and Deepavali firecrackers. Has your father been laid off?
No - your father does something that only people who work in computers can do - he works "from home". This means he is available ALL the time to change diapers. Isn't that fun?
No, you can't go to school "from home".

The Australian race attacks

This post is primarily concerning the media reaction to these hate-crime incidents in Australia.
The English media takes a theme and then runs after it like a pack of hounds without adding ANY insight into what is going on. Then some get tired of it, turn tail and start blaming ourselves.
This happened with the attacks in Australia.
I noticed two kinds of reactions - along the following lines:
1. Many people who had actually been in Australia started offering advice on how Indians should learn better English, have more white friends and not just have Indian friends and so on.
2. Then some started saying that Indians were racists too. Outlook ran an article titled "Aren't we racists too?". So, the "blame ourselves" phase had started.

Let us address each of these arguments:

Indians do not mingle well
Rediff solicited advice for escaping such attacks. Naturally, you would expect that you will get advice on avoiding some neighborhoods. One person suggested that you pull the door handles of all the cars parked in the road. Because the cars have theft alarms, they will raise a racket and you can run off safely. That is sound advice.
Instead many spent their time advicing that Indians should have white friends; that they only have Indian friends. That they have language issues. One frequent comment was that Indians spoke in Indian languages in public places.
In other words, Indians behaved normally like any other minority - and that is apparently a crime.
The reason such comments come up is because people fail to distinguish between actual crimes and what are, at worst, cultural transgressions. If Australians cannot tolerate people talking in different languages in public places, then the problem is with them - not with Indians. In these situations, some blame "ourselves" mainly because they think we somehow owe a lot to Australians for "letting" us into their precious country.
There is also a class issue here. Some of us do not like the "trash" that make it abroad. We want sophisticated English-speaking, "cool" upper class guys to "represent" India abroad. When we see ordinary people who struggle with English actually travelling with us in flights! Oh, the horror of it! How dare they!

Aren't we racists too?
So, then Outlook had this entire, confusing feature article on how Indians are racists too. I call it confused because most of the time they were talking about the Indian preference for fairness. How is that linked to race? I don't know.
What they WANTED to refer to was discrimination, not racism. It is nobody's argument that India is somehow a country with zero discrimination. In fact we have the ubiquitous caste system.
But these have nothing to do with the Australian race attacks. Why? Because we are talking about the distinction between hate CRIMES and hate speech or discrimination.

When we talk about an issue, we can discuss if it is correct or wrong using three levels:
1. Moral - if by commonly accepted logic, we can decide that an issue is right or wrong.
2. Ethical - if by ethical guidelines of a profession and individual behavior we can judge correct behavior.
3. Legal - if by the law of the land an issue is right or wrong.
Legal definitions are the narrowest and violations of legal standards are worst. This is because legal standards are the most objective and can be "judged" easily.

For example, take the case of adultery. It is held to be morally wrong in most societies. But it is not a crime by law. You cannot prosecute someone for adultery. This is because it is a matter of individual choice.
Recently two news organizations in North India "staged" a burning of Dhoni's effigy after the T20 World Cup loss. Then they filmed it and telecast it as if it were news. This is an ethical violation, but not a legal violation.
The issue of discrimination is similar. While some discrimination is punishable by law, Indians' preference for fairness is a MORAL issue. It is not a legal issue. There is no law that CAN govern a society's collective preferences. It can only be managed through education.
But the Australian attacks on Indians made it a LEGAL issue. By the Australian governing laws themselves, hate speech is different from hate crimes. Most hate speech in developed countries is protected by Freedom of Speech covenants. (Not so in India, but that is for later).
The reason why we are shocked by these attacks is not because Australians harbor racism in their minds or speech. It is because a few criminals actually violated common law and violently attacked other individuals. That is a CRIME - we cannot equate that with whatever we THINK about other people.
In Indian media, I see this confusion and blurring of moral vs legal issues happening all the time. When Ramalinga Raju was caught, some commentators thought this was an ethical issue. It was not. It was a legal issue. He violated the law, not some vaguely defined ethical guideline.
In fact we see this blurring lines all the time - with people confusing moral, subjective determinations with legal determinations. A few years back, an young Anglo-Indian woman was attacked and killed by a few guys in Chennai. She was killed while leaving a pub. This was enough for the magazine Kalki to opine that "while on the one hand the guys were wrong, on the other hand, she was wrong in going to a pub". You see what is wrong with this argument? The "one hand" action was a crime, while the "other hand" was at best a moral determination of Kalki editor. You cannot compare a moral violation with a legal violation.
So, in conclusion, you cannot say "we are racists too" as an answer to Australian crimes. We are not angry with Australians for being racists - we are angry because a few of them are actually committing crimes.

Section 295-A and the Indian Law on Hate Speech

I also believe that the Indian law on hate speech is highly restrictive. It should be more liberal and protect free speech. For example, I don't think Varun Gandhi should have been prosecuted for saying vile things on the campaign trail. Adding to this, was the fact that he was booked under the NSA. That made little sense - you cannot punish people under the National Security Act just for SAYING something.
Let us consider the text of Section 295-A of the Indian Penal Code:

Deliberate and malicious acts intended to outrage religious feelings of any class by insulting its religion or religious beliefs.-- Whoever, with deliberate and malicious intention of outraging the religious feelings of any class of 6[ citizens of India], 7[ by words, either spoken or written, or by signs or by visible representations or otherwise] insults or attempts to insult the religion or the religious beliefs of that class, shall be punished with imprisonment of either description for a term which may extend to 8[ three years], or with fine, or with both.]

This is very broad. There are other sections which talk about punishing speech against ethnicities.
While Indian law should vigorously punish hate crimes, the above provision has led to harassment of liberal and secular commentators. For example, actress Kushboo was harassed for talking about pre-marital sex (a few years back) and dragged to the court by the above provision.

I believe that caste-based or color-based feelings can only be removed from a system by education on a long-term. Meanwhile, the only choice left to civil society is to prosecute EFFECTS of such discrimination, such as civil suits and criminal suits on attacks.
The least we can do is not to confuse the debate further by comparing actual crimes with vague thoughts we are supposed to feel guilty about.

Nothing wrong with Talking while Walking

A recent Idea! ad generated some controversy about talking on the cell phone while walking. People protested that it was contrary to Road safety.
This is not unusual - in India, collectively people have decided that pedestrians are to blame for their own deaths or loss of limb. The other day, I saw a girl crossing a junction with no signal - she was talking on the cellphone. A passing scooterist speeded up on seeing her, came very close, and yelled at her for talking on the cellphone while crossing.
This seems completely weird to me - what these people are seeking is a justification that the roads belong to vehicles; vehicles have right of way in unmarked crossings.
To me, it is perfectly ok to talk on the cellphone while crossing an unmarked (no-signal) crossing.
Refer to my post on pedestrian rights here - I think what vehicle owners are out to do is to cheat and bully pedestrians out of their right to walk freely in the road.
Indian cities are not pedestrian friendly - there are no sidewalks and most crossings have no signals. In this situation, pedestrians have right of way in unmarked crossings.
What is wrong with walking while talking on the cellphone? Pedestrians do not need licenses to walk on the roads. They are perfectly within their rights to talk on the cellphone while walking.
This whole myth of "oh the evil pedestrians mess up traffic" is a product of plain thuggery. What these people want you to believe is that pedestrians would simply stop and chat on the middle of the road. As we all know, this assumes that vehicle owners are reasonable people who mind their business while pedestrians are somehow loafers with nothing to do.
The true factor behind such idiocies is that vehicle owners believe that they have potent weapons (their vehicles) which can cause irreparable harm to a pedestrians' life. So they are using this bullying tactic to deny pedestrians their rights - in reality, this is the age-old Indian trends of abuse of power and blaming the victim.
I hate people who provide an intellectual justification for such power-abusers.
In reality Road-safety in the Indian context has nothing to do with pedestrians - it has to do with drivers who respect no rules and are ignorant of other people's rights; and roads which force pedestrians to share space with vehicles.
Meanwhile pedestrians have every right to talk while walking.

Translation for Tamil short story - 3 (Iravum Pagalum)

The original Tamil version of this story is here. You can read my other short stories listed in the left hand nav bar under "My Short Stories" (below the "Featured Posts" section).

Night and Day
-------------
Ramiah Ariya

Ekambaram sat in the watchman's room outside the school. It was very quiet. A little bit ominous.
Ekambaram thought he could retire and spend time at home. But his son had not yet taken a proper job. Ekambaram wanted to work as a day watchman. It is easy to be a watchman in a school. You can chase around the children. Working as a watchman in a bank was the toughest. You have to salute people as they go in and out. Also, you need a gun license. Ekambaram liked the idea of shooting with a gun. But he had never touched a gun in his life.
In school, you just needed a small stick. He had a big moustache. He thought the kids would get scared easily. But the principal said they needed a night watchman.
Usually when the clock strikes nine, Ekambaram was ready to sleep. He had not slept alone for the last thirty years. His wife Meenakshi would keep talking and he would sleep hearing her prattle on.
Ekambaram was frustrated. What would ahppen to his health if he kept awake like this?
He asked his wife to accompany him. "We can spend the night talking", he said.
"I have work in the morning", she said. "I will be talking and you will just go to sleep."
The first day he felt like going to war. His son scanned his uniform up and down.
"You look like you are in the military", he said.
Then he turned to his mom and said, "Last week a student at that school committed suicide."
Ekambaram started and said, "Where? In the school?"
"No, at his hom. But apparently his teacher said something that caused it"
Meenakshi said,"Stop scaring your father."
"No. Ma, they say if someone dies at a young age, their soul keeps wandering round and round.."
"Why don't you start?" said Meenakshi to Ekambaram.
Ekambaram prayed for a couple of minutes and then left.
******************

An owl emitted a wild cry. He could hear a dog howl far away. He remembered watching a movie called "Jagan Mohini" and getting so scared, he had a high fever for a few days. During those periods, most places had a burning ghat.
The clock struck twelve somewhere.
Are ghosts real?
He shook his head. Why think about that now..let us think of something good.
He started remembering his old friends. There was a guy called Rao. He worked in the military for a long time. His wife used to cook very well.
At one point, Rao said he had actually seen a ghost. He conveyed this information when they were all sitting and chatting in the terrace of a house in Villivakkam.
They were playing cards and one of them was narrating his visit to the Chottanikkara Bhagavathi temple. He said the women danced wildly like ghosts and one look at them was enough to scare you for life.
In that gathering there was an intellectual who used to read newspapers. He said, "All of that is caused by mental illness".
"It is not mental illness. If you don't believe in this, you can't believe in anything."
"If there is a God.."
"If you don't have faith, there is no life"
"I can understand believing in good..but why believe in this?"
Another person said,"You are talking as if there are no ghosts. Remember the time Maari's father died? Remember how that ghost scared all of us?"
Everybody agreed with this.
"In the night there were weird sounds. Sounded like someone crying. We all ran away."
The intellectual said, "We have to be rational and think about this."
"By the time you are half way thinking, the ghost would beat you up and run off"
"If you are so brave, why don't you go to the burning ghat at night?"
"Why?"
"Why don't you go? The ghosts would chase you and kill you"
"It is only because of such people without faith that we have no rains", said a guy from Thirunelveli.
"Boss, I can understand if you believe in God. Why should we believe in ghosts?"
At this point, when nobody knew how to counter the intellectual, Rao started talking. He was staring at the sky. He spoke in that pose.
" In Nineteen Sixty Seven, I saw a ghost".
Everyone looked at him.
"Yes, I saw a ghost. I even touched it"
The intellectual joked, "Did you get married at that time?". Nobody laughed. The nearby trees whispered to themselves.
"I was walking near my home in Pattukottai. A white female form came before me. It came straight for me. I tried to step away. But it came right in front of me. When I got very close I waved my hand to push it away. My hand went in and came back out"
Rao's voice kept falling.
"Yes, I saw a ghost", he finished.
Nobody spoke for a long time.
*********************************
Ekambaram got up and started walking. He had to go round the school building. What if someone came floating in front of him? His body shook thinking about it. It was two in the morning. He went through the school corridors.
In the second floor, he heard some noise. There was a door named "Biology". He could hear something scratching the door. He turned and walked stiffly away.
There was a movie called "The Exorcist". Some guy went to watch it alone. AT the end they found him dead after vomiting blood. Ekambaram had heard of this. Who asked this guy to go watch the movie alone?
This job was like watching the Exorcist. If he were at home now, he would be fast asleep, hugging Meenakshi.
Dawn arrived soon. Ekambaram ran home.
"Meenakshi, let me quit this job", he said.
"Why? Are you sleepy?"
"No, I keep remembering ghost stories. Remember we saw this movie "Jagan Mohini"? All those ghosts are dancing before my eyes."
"Mother slept very well here", said his son.
"Did you really?" said Ekambaram.
"Shut up. If it is very quiet, it is natural to be scared. Take our transistor radio today."
Ekambaram begged his son to accompany him that night.
"I will come tomorrow night", he said. "Tonight is the New Moon day - a period in which ghosts go nuts."
************************************
That night Ekambaram saw the skeleton.
When he was walking near the Biology lab, he took out his whistle and blew it. The sound echoed around in the still night. When he turned to go, he felt someone observing him.
He looked around slowly. It was his own reflection in the glass window. He cursed himself for being so afraid.
A guy took up a challenge to go to the burning ghat in the middle of the night. He did go. When he was leaving after going around the burning bodies, he felt someone grabbing him from behind. He yelled out and fell dead of shock. The next day, they found that his shirt had caught in a tree branch. That was it.
Like that story, Ekambaram thought he was afraid of everything. He went without thinking, to the glass window and peered inside.
First nothing was visible inside. Then, slowly, like the riverbed showing up in disturbed water, he could see a white skeleton.
Ekambaram rubbed his eyes and looked again. Yes, there was a skeleton there. And it seemed to move slightly!
In dreams sometimes he used to feel like moving. But he could not move his arms or legs. The same feeling came over him now. He moved with great difficulty. After stepping away from the window, he ran down the stairs.
He came panting to his place. If there was someone there it would have helped. But in the houses around the school everyone was sleeping. They were sleeping without pity or knowledge of the blood bath going on here.
He wanted to lock up the doors and leave the school. If they asked the next day, he would tell them he cannot spend the night with a skeleton.
But he had no wish to walk in the pitch dark to his home.
He switched on the radio. Initially there was just static. Then a shrill female voice started singing "Beez Saal Baadh..".
*****************************
The next day, during lunch hour, Ekambaram and Meenakshi entered the principal's room. A girl was just leaving the principal's room crying. The principal's face changed as soon as they came in - she smiled at them.
"Come in Ekambaram. Come in..what is the matter?"
"Madam, I am not able to work the night shift...my body hurts."
"But you have only been here for two days."
"He is scared", said Meenakshi.
The principal laughed. "Scared..why?"
Ekambaram responded: "No Madam, I am not really scared. Why should I be scared. I have worked in hospital mortuaries earlier"
"He is lying Madam. He is always a little easily scared. This morning he came running home"
Ekambaram felt humiliated. Now, in day light, when he thought of the skeleton, it looked funny.
The principal said, "Do you have any other job available?"
"No Madam."
"OK, from tomorrow come on in the day shift. Let us try that for two or three days."
Ekambaram was happy. He said, "I am not really scared madam. In my younger days, when we came back alone from night show cinema.."
"Let us go", said Meenakshi.
********************************
The next morning, Ekambaram twirled his imposing moustache and was ready at work. The principal arrived at eight thirty. He saluted her.
"Close the door exactly at Nine" she instructed and left.
No body came till eight fifty. Suddenly, with ten minutes to go, students started rushing in. Moms and Dads came dragging their children and threw them in through the gate. Some children went wailing inside.
Ekambaram looked at the clock. It was nine. It was time to show the legendary Ekambaram strictness. He tried to close the door. Students ran faster inside. A couple of people rammed into the door.
Somebody yelled "Hey..." from behind the closed door. They pushed the door from the other side. Ekambaram imagined that he was defending the fort from enemy soldiers and pushed back.
"Boom!" The door opened wide and Ekambaram fell down.
A woman built like Sylvester Stallone stood at the door. She laughed at Ekambaram.
Ekambaram said, "I have to close the door", and ran forward.
"Why are you closing the door?"
"Why don't you come before nine?"
"Do you know who I am?"
"I don't care..rules are rules"
Several mothers stood behind the door in anger. The principal came.
"Ekambaram, why did you push the door"
"But..you said..Madam"
"Yes, but you should not have done this..sorry madam"
Stallone lady went inside after yelling, "Be careful" at Ekambaram.
*********************
Ekambaram sat tired all over. He has just finished watering all the plants. At some distance, Kinder Garten children were coming out of their room. They ran helter skelter. The teacher was herding them together.
Ekambaram closed his eyes. Someone shook him awake. It was the KG teacher.
"Come with me", she said.
There was a pump close by. Two boys stood below the pump. The teacher pulled down the boys' trousers.
"Start pumping", she told Ekambaram.
Ekambaram started pumping water.
Suddenly there was some commotion in in the ground. The children started running back and forth. The teacher said, "Wash them clean" and left.
Ekambaram looked down. The two children held their trousers in their hands and leered at him.
********************
At lunch time, Ekambaram started for the biology lab. Some students were sitting in the room. He entered with hesitation and stood before the skeleton.
He thought, "Was I really afraid of this?". It looked sad. Who knows whose skeleton this was. It was tall.
They used to say long back, that you need not be afraid of vampires or poltergeists - the only ghost you should really be afraid of is the Mohini. When you are walking alone in the night, the Mohini comes behind you and asks for betel leaves. You have to handover the leaves on a knife edge. Then it would leave you alone. Otherwise, you are finished.
When he turned around, the students were standing behind him. They were also staring at the skeleton.
"It is the previous watchman", said one of them.
Everyone laughed at this.
"It looks like Thanigai", said another guy.
"No..it looks like your father", said Thanigai.
"Hey, be respectful", said the first guy.
"Boys.." started Ekambaram. But when he turned to look at them, the fight had started. Two of them were hitting each other and then, quickly, rolling on the floor.
Ekambaram said, "Boys..stop it." The other students were watching the fight like watching cricket.
Ekambaram tried to separate them. He got a couple of blows himself. Then one of the students pushed him away.
He staggered and fell at the feet of the skeleton. The skeleton seemed to be laughing at him.

**********************
The principal looked at Ekambaram with pity. He had a small band-aid on his finger.
"So you want to go back to the night shift?"
"Yes Madam"
"I know..I feel like running away from here myself."
Ekambaram started for home. At night he would think of all those ghosts. It would even be soothing.
********************

Tamil Short Story - 3 - Night and Day

The translation is available here. My other short stories and their translations are listed on the left hand bar, in the "My Short Stories" section, below the "Featured Posts" section.

இரவும் பகலும்

-------------------
இரா.இராமையா

பள்ளிக்கு உள்ளே இருந்த வாட்ச்மேன் அறையில் ஏகாம்பரம் உட்கார்ந்திருந்தார். சுற்றிலும் மிக அமைதியாக இருந்தது. சற்றுப் பயமாகக் கூட இருந்தது.
ஏகாம்பரம் ரிடையராகி சும்மா வீட்டில் இருக்கலாம் என்று நினைத்தார். ஆனால் பையன் இன்னும் சரியான வேலைக்குப் போகவில்லை. பள்ளியில் பகல் நேர வாட்ச்மேன் வேலைக்குத் தான் அவருக்கு ஆசை. பள்ளியில் வாட்ச்மேனாக இருப்பது எளிது. சிறுவர்களை ஓட ஓட விரட்டலாம். பேங்க் வாட்ச்மேன் வேலை தான் கஷ்டம். போக வர சலாம் போட வேண்டும். துப்பாக்கி லைசென்ஸ் வேண்டும். ஏகாம்பரத்திற்கு துப்பாக்கி சுட ஆசை உண்டு. ஆனால் வாழ்க்கையில் துப்பாக்கியை தொட்டு பார்த்ததில்லை.
பள்ளியில் சிறு கம்பு ஒன்று போதும். நல்ல பெரிய மீசை வைத்திருந்தார். அதற்க்கு சிறுவர்கள் பயந்து விடுவார்கள் என்று நினைத்தார். ஆனால் தலைமை ஆசிரியை இரவு வாட்ச்மேன் தான் வேண்டும் என்றாள்.
ஏகாம்பரத்திற்கு மணி ஒன்பது அடித்தால் தலை சுற்றிக் கொண்டு தூக்கம் வரும். கடந்த முப்பது வருடங்களாகத் தனியாக இரவு தூங்கியதில்லை. அவர் மனைவி மீனாட்சி எப்போதும் ஏதாவது பேசிக் கொண்டிருப்பாள். அதைக் கேட்டுக் கொண்டே தூங்கி விடுவார்.
ஏகாம்பரம் தன்னையே நொந்து கொண்டார். ராத்தூக்கம் விழித்தால் உடம்பு என்னத்திற்கு ஆகிறது?
மனைவியிடம், "நீயும் வாயேன். பேசிட்டு இருக்கலாம்.", என்றார்.
"எனக்குக் காலையில வேலை இருக்கு. நான் பேசிட்டு இருப்பேன் - நீங்க பாட்டுக்குத் தூங்கிருவீங்க. காவல் காத்த மாதிரி தான்," என்றாள்.
முதல் நாள் இரவு அவர் கிளம்பும் பொழுது போருக்குப் போவதைப் போல இருந்தது. பையன் அவர் யூநிஃபார்மை மேலும் கீழும் பார்த்தான்.
"மிலிடரி மாதிரி இருக்கப்பா ", என்றான்.
பிறகு அவன் அம்மாவிடம், "போன வாரம் அந்த ஸ்கூல் பையன் ஒருத்தன் தற்கொலை பண்ணிக்கிச்சாம்" , என்றான்.
ஏகாம்பரம் திடுக்கிட்டு, "எங்க? ஸ்கூல்லய?", என்று கேட்டார்.
"வீட்டுல தான். ஆனா ஸ்கூல் டீச்சர் ஏதோ சொல்லிச்சாம்"
"ஏண்டா உங்க அப்பாவ பயமுறுத்துற?"
"இல்லம்மா. திடீருன்னு சின்ன வயசுல போயிட்டா ஆத்மா சாந்தி கிடைக்காம சுத்து சுத்துன்னு சுத்தி வந்து.."
"ஏங்க..நீங்க கிளம்புங்க", என்றாள் மீனாட்சி.
ஏகாம்பரம் பிள்ளையாரைச் சற்று நேரம் கும்பிட்டுக் கிளம்பினார்.
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சற்றுத் தொலைவில் கோட்டான் ஒன்று கத்தியது. தூரத்தில் நாய் ஊளையிட்டது.
பல வருடங்களுக்கு முன்னால் ஜகன் மோகினி என்னும் படத்தைப் பார்த்து ஜன்னி கண்டது அவருக்கு நினைவு வந்தது. அப்பொழுதெல்லாம் பாதி இடங்களில் சுடுகாடு உண்டு.
மணி எங்கோ பன்னிரண்டு அடித்தது.
பேய் நிஜமாகவே உண்டா?
ஏகாம்பரம் தலையை உலுக்கிக் கொண்டார். எதற்கு இப்போது அந்த நினைவு? நல்லதாக நினைக்கலாம்.
சற்று நேரம் தன் நண்பர்களை நினைவுபடுத்திக் கொண்டார். ராவ் என்று ஒருத்தன் இருந்தான். பல வருடங்கள் அவன் மிலிடரியில் வேலை செய்தான். அவன் மனைவி பிரமாதமாகச் சமைப்பாள்.
ராவ் ஒரு முறைப் பேயைப் பார்த்ததாகச் சொன்னான். ஒரு நாள் இரவு வில்லிவாக்கத்தில் எல்லோரும் ஒரு வீட்டு மாடியில் உட்கார்ந்து பேசிக் கொண்டிருக்கும் பொது தான் அவன் இத்தகவலைத் தெரிவித்தான்.
சீட்டாடிக் கொண்டு இருக்கும் போது சோட்டாணிக்கரை பகவதி கோவில் போய் விட்டு வந்த அனுபவத்தை ஒருவர் சொல்லிக் கொண்டிருந்தார். பேயாட்டம் ஆடுவதாகவும், பெண்களைப் பார்த்தாலே பாத்ரூம் வந்து விடும் என்று சொன்னார்.
ஒரு பெண் தலைவிரிகோலமாக வானத்துக்கும் பூமிக்கும் குதித்தாளாம். சாதாரண மனிதர்கள் அப்படி குதிக்கவே முடியாது.
சீட்டாட்டக் கும்பலில் அடிக்கடி தினத்தந்தி, மாலை முரசு படிக்கும் அறிவாளி ஒருவர் இருந்தார். அவர், "அதெல்லாம் மன நோய்ப்பா", என்றார்.
"மனநோய் எல்லாம் கிடையாது. இதெல்லாம் நம்பிக்கை இல்லன்னா எதையுமே நம்ப முடியாது."
"ஏம்பா, கடவுள்னு ஒருத்தர் இருந்தா.."
"நம்பிகை இல்லன்னா வாழ்க்கையே கிடையாதுப்பா .."
"நல்லதுல நம்பிக்கை வச்சா சரி. இதுல எதுக்கு நம்பிக்கை?"
மற்றொருவர், "நீ இவ்வளோ சொல்றியே..சாமியில்ல, பூதமில்லைனு. நம்ம மாரியோட அப்பா இறந்த அன்னிக்கு அந்த பேய் என்ன பாடு படுத்திச்சு தெரியுமா?"
எல்லோரும் இதற்கு ஆமோதித்தார்கள்.
"நைட்டு தூங்கும் போது டொக்கு டொக்குன்னு நடக்குற சத்தம். ஒரே அழுகுற சத்தம். நானெல்லாம் ஓடியே போயிட்டேன்."
தினத்தந்தி படிப்பவர், "இதெல்லாம் பகுத்தறிஞ்சு யோசிக்கணும்", என்றார்.
"அதுக்குள்ள பேய் அடிச்சுப் போட்டுட்டுப் போயிட்டே இருக்கும்"
"நீ இவ்வளோ சொல்றியே..நடு ராத்திரி சுடுகாடு போயேன்."
"எதுக்கு?"
"நீ போயேன். துரத்தித் துரத்தி அடிக்கும் உன்னைய"
"இந்த மாதிரி நம்பிக்கை இல்லாத ஆளுங்கனால தான் மழை வர மாட்டேங்கு", என்றார் திருநெல்வேலிக்காரர் ஒருவர்.
"ஏம்பா.. கடவுளாண்ட நம்பிக்கை வச்சா சரி..பேயாண்ட போயி எதுக்கு நம்பிக்கை வைக்கணும்?"
பகுத்தறிவாளரின் வாதங்களினால் எல்லோரும் வாயடைத்துப் போயிருந்த நிலையில் ராவ் பேசினான். அவன் எங்கோ வானத்தை வெறித்துக் கொண்டிருந்தான். அப்படியே பேசினான்.
"இன் நைன்டீன் சிக்ஸ்டி செவென் , ஐ ஸா பேய்".
எல்லோரும் அவனைப் பார்த்தார்கள்.
"ஆமா நான் பேயைப் பார்த்தேன். தொட்டுப் பார்த்தேன்."
பகுத்தறிவாளர், "அப்போ தான் கல்யாணம் ஆச்சா?" என்று விட்டுச் சிரித்தார். வேறு யாருமே சிரிக்கவில்லை. பக்கத்துத் தென்னை மரங்கள் அமானுஷ்யமாக உரசிக் கொள்ளும் சத்தம் கேட்டது.
"பட்டுக் கோட்டையில எங்க வீட்டுப் பக்கம் நடந்து போயிட்டிருந்தேன். எதிர வெள்ளையா ஒரு பெண் உருவம் வந்தது. நேரா வந்தது. நான் விலகிப் போனேன். நேரா முட்டுற மாதிரி வந்துது. கையை வீசினேன். என் கை உள்ள போய் வெளிய வந்திருச்சி."
ராவ் குரல் இறங்கிக் கொண்டே போனது. "எஸ். ஐ ஸா பேய்", என்று முடித்தான்.
யார் முகத்திலும் ஈயாடவில்லை.
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ஏகாம்பரம் மெதுவாக எழுந்து நடந்தார். ஸ்கூலை ஒரு ரவுண்டு வர வேண்டும். நேராக யாராவது மிதந்து வந்தால் என்ன செய்வது? அவருக்குக் கால் உதறியது.
மணி இரண்டு ஆகி விட்டது. மெதுவாக ஒவ்வொரு மாடியாக ரவுண்டு வந்தார்.
இரண்டாவது மாடியில் ஏதோ சத்தம் கேட்பது போல இருந்தது. 'பயாலஜி' என்று ஒரு கதவு மேல் எழுதி இருந்தது. உள்ளே ஏதோ பிறாண்டுவது போல இருந்தது. ஏகாம்பரம் விறைப்பாகத் திரும்பி நடந்தார்.
"எக்ஸார்சிஸ்ட்" என்று ஒரு படம் வந்தது. அந்தப் படத்தை ஒருவன் தனியாகப் பார்த்தானாம். முடிவில் ரத்தம் கக்கி இறந்து கிடந்தானாம். ஏகாம்பரம் கேள்விப்பட்டிருந்தார். இவனை யார் தனியாகப் போய்ப் பார்க்கச் சொன்னது?
இந்த வேலை அந்தப் படம் பார்ப்பதைப் போலத் தான் இருக்கிறது. இந்நேரம் வீட்டில் இருந்தால் மீனாட்சி மேல் காலைப் போட்டுக் கொண்டு நன்றாகத் தூங்கி இருப்பார்.
சிறிது நேரத்தில் விடிந்து விட்டது. ஏகாம்பரம் வீட்டிற்கு ஓடினார்.
"மீனாட்சி, இந்த வேலை வேணாம்டி." என்றார் மனைவியிடம்.
"ஏன் தூக்கம் வருதா ?"
"அதில்லடி. நைட்டெல்லாம் ஒரே பேய் நினைப்பாவே இருக்கு. இந்தப் படம் ஒன்னு பார்த்தமே ..ஜகன் மோகினி.. அந்தப் பேயெல்லாம் கண்ணு முன்னாடி நிக்குதடி."
"அம்மா இங்க நிம்மதியா தூங்கினாங்க", என்றான் பையன்.
"அடிப்பாவி".
"சும்மா இருடா. ரொம்பச் சத்தமே இல்லாம இருந்தா அப்படித் தான். நம்ப வீட்டு ரேடியோ எடுத்துட்டுப் போங்க இன்னைக்கு."
பையனிடம், "டேய்..நீ துணைக்கு வாயேன்..இன்னைக்கு நைட்டு.." என்று கெஞ்சினார்.
"நாளைக்கு நைட்டு வரேன். இன்னைக்கு நைட்டு அமாவாசையா வேற இருக்கு. பேயெல்லாம் கூத்தாடுற நேரம்", என்றான் பையன்.

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அன்று இரவு தான் ஏகாம்பரம் எலும்புக் கூட்டைப் பார்த்தார்.
பயாலஜி லேபரேட்டரி அறை அருகே ரவுண்டு வந்த பொழுது விசிலை எடுத்து 'சீய்' என்று ஊதினார். அந்தச் சத்தம் பள்ளிச் சுவர்களில் பட்டு எதிரொலித்தது. சட்டென்று திரும்பிய பொழுது யாரோ அவரையே பார்ப்பது போல இருந்தது.
மெதுவாகத் திரும்பிப் பார்த்தார். கண்ணாடி ஜன்னலில் அவருடைய பிரதிபலிப்புத் தான். "ச்சே..இதற்க்கா பயந்தோம்?" என்று நினைத்தார்.
சுடுகாட்டுக்கு அமாவாசை நள்ளிரவு போய் வருகிறேன் என்று சவால் விட்டானாம் ஒருவன். போனான். போய் சுற்றி விட்டு வெளியே வரும் போது சட்டென்று யாரோ பின்னால் இருந்து இழுப்பது போல இருக்கின்றது. "ஐயோ!" என்று கத்தி உயிரை விட்டான். மறு நாள் பார்த்தால் மரத்தின் கிளையில் அவன் சட்டை மாட்டியிருக்கிறது..அவ்வளவே.
அந்தக் கதையை போல எதைப் பார்த்தாலும் பயமாக இருக்கிறது என்று நினைத்துக் கொண்டார். தன்னை அறியாமல் கண்ணாடி ஜன்னல் அருகே சென்று உற்றுப் பார்த்தார்.
சற்று நேரம் எதுவும் தெளிவாக தெரியவில்லை. பிறகு கலங்கிய நதித் தண்ணீரில் அடி மணல் தெரிவது போல ஒரு வெளுப்பான எலும்புக் கூடு தெரிந்தது.
ஏகாம்பரம் திடுக்கிட்டு கண்ணைக் கசக்கி மறுபடிப் பார்த்தார். அங்கே நிஜமாகவே ஒரு எலும்புக் கூடு தெரிந்தது. லேசாக அசைவது போலவும் இருந்தது.
ஏகாம்பரம், "ஆ" , என்றார்.
கனவில் சில சமயம் அவர் அசைய நினைப்பார். ஆனால் கை காலை அசைக்க முடியாது. அது போன்ற ஒரு உணர்வு அவருக்கு வந்தது. மிகவும் சிரமப்பட்டு நகர்ந்தார். நகர்ந்து சற்று தூரம் சென்று ஓட்டம் பிடித்தார்.
இரைக்க இரைக்கத் தம் இடத்திற்கு வந்தார். துணைக்கு யாரும் இருந்தால் பரவாயில்லை. ஆனால் எதிரே, சுற்றி இருந்த வீடுகளில் எல்லோரும் தூங்கிக் கொண்டிருந்தார்கள். இங்கே நடக்கும் அகோர நாடகத்தை அறியாமல் இரக்கமே இல்லாமல் தூங்குகிறார்கள்.
பேசாமல் பள்ளியைப் பூட்டிக் கொண்டு வீட்டுக்குப் போய் விடலாம் என்று அவர் முடிவு செய்தார். நாளைக்குக் கேட்டால் இப்படி எலும்புக் கூட்டுடன் குடித்தனம் செய்ய முடியாது என்று சொல்லிக் கொள்ளலாம்.
ஆனால் இந்த இருட்டில் வீடு வரை போக வேண்டுமே?
ரேடியோவைப் போட்டார். சிறுது நேரம் 'கர, புர ' என்று சத்தம் கேட்டது. பிறகு கீச் என்ற குரலில் 'நெஞ்சம் மறப்பதில்லை' என்று பாட்டுத் தொடங்கியது.
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மறு நாள் மதியம் உணவு இடைவெளியில் ஏகாம்பரமும் மீனாட்சியும் தலைமை ஆசிரியை அறைக்குள் நுழைந்தார்கள். ஆசிரியை அறையில் இருந்து ஒரு மாணவி அழுது கொண்டே சென்றாள். உள்ளே அவர்கள் போனவுடன் ஆசிரியை முகம் ஸ்விட்ச் போட்டது போல மாறியது. அவர்களைப் பார்த்துச் சிரித்தாள்.
"வாங்க ஏகாம்பரம். என்ன விஷயம்? வாங்கம்மா.."
"இல்லம்மா. இந்த நைட் வாட்ச்மேன் வேல கொஞ்சம் உடம்பெல்லாம் முடியல."
"ரெண்டு நாளா தான வந்திருக்கீங்க?"
"இவரு பயப்படராரும்மா" என்றாள் மீனாட்சி.
"பயமா?" என்று சிரித்தாள் ஆசிரியை.
"அதெல்லாம் இல்லம்மா. நான் ஏன் பயப்படணும்? அந்தக் காலத்துல தனியா ஆஸ்பத்திரி மார்ச்சுவரி வேல பாத்திருக்கேன்"
"கதை விடராரும்மா. இவருக்கு எப்பவுமே கொஞ்சம் பயம் அதிகம். இன்னைக்குக் காலையில வீட்டுக்கு வந்து விழுந்துட்டாரு."
ஏகாம்பரம் அவமானமாக உணர்ந்தார். இப்போது பகல் நேரத்தில் எலும்புக் கூட்டை நினைத்தால் சிரிப்பு தான் வந்தது. அது மூஞ்சியும் முகரையும்..
ஆசிரியை யோசித்தாள். "வேற வேலை எதுவும் கை வசம்
இருக்கா ?" என்றாள்.
"இல்லம்மா"
"சரி. நாளையில இருந்து பகல்ல வாங்க. ரெண்டு மூணு நாள் அது ஒத்து வருதான்னு பாருங்க."
ஏகாம்பரம் நன்றியுடன் கை கூப்பினார். "பயம்னுல்லாம் இல்லம்மா. ஒரு மனக் குழப்பம்..அவ்ளோ தான். நான் அந்தக் காலத்துல ராத்திரி ஷோ சினிமா பார்த்திட்டு வரும் போது..."
"சரி..கிளம்புங்க" என்றாள் மீனாட்சி.

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சுறுசுறுப்புடன் காலையில் எழுந்து திருநீறு இட்டு மீசையை முறுக்கி விட்டு விறைப்பாக பள்ளி முன்னால் நின்றார் ஏகாம்பரம். எட்டரைக்கெல்லாம் தலைமை ஆசிரியை வந்தாள். அவளுக்கு ஒரு சலாம் வைத்தார் ஏகாம்பரம்.
"ஒன்பது மணிக்குச் சரியாக் கதவைச் சாத்தணும்", என்று விட்டுப் போனாள்.
எட்டு ஐம்பது வரை யாருமே பள்ளியில் இல்லை. சரியாக எட்டு ஐம்பதுக்கு தபதபவென்று ஒரு கூட்டம் வந்தது. அம்மாக்களும் அப்பாக்களும் பிள்ளைகளை இழுத்துக் கொண்டு வந்து உள்ளே வீசினார்கள். சில சிறுவர்கள் ஓவென்று அழுது கொண்டே போனார்கள்.
ஏகாம்பரம் மணி பார்த்தார். ஒன்பது ஆயிற்று. புது வாட்ச்மேன் எவ்வளவு கறார் என்று இவர்களுக்கு காட்ட வேண்டிய நேரம் வந்து விட்டது. கதவைச் சாத்தப் போனார். பிள்ளைகள் உள்ளே ஓடும் வேகம் அதிகமாயிற்று. இரண்டு பேர் ஓடி வந்து கதவை முட்டினார்கள்.
"ஏய்.." என்று சரத்குமாரைப் போல கதவுக்குப் பின்னால் இருந்து யாரோ கத்தினார்கள். கதவை மறுபக்கம் இருந்து தள்ளினார்கள். ஏகாம்பரம், கோட்டையை எதிரிப் படைகள் பிடிக்க வருவதாகக் கற்பனை செய்து கொண்டார். ஓங்கித் தள்ளினார்.
'படார்' என்று ஒரு சத்தம். கதவு முழுக்கத் திறந்தது. ஏகாம்பரம் தள்ளிப் போய் விழுந்தார்.
வாசலில் ஆறடி உயரத்தில் பீமசேனன் போல ஒரு அம்மா நின்றாள் . விழுந்து கிடந்த ஏகாம்பரத்தைப் பார்த்துச் சிரித்தாள்.
"கதவைச் சாத்தணும்", என்று ஓடி வந்தார் ஏகாம்பரம்.
"ஏன்யா கதவைச் சாத்துற?"
"ஒன்பது மணிக்கு முன்னால வரது தான?"
"நான் யாரு தெரியுமா உனக்கு?"
"ரூல்சுன்னா ரூல்சு தான்"
பின்னால் கோபத்துடன் பல அம்மாக்கள் நின்றார்கள். தலைமை ஆசிரியை வந்தாள்.
"ஏகாம்பரம்..ஏன் கதவைத் தள்ளி விட்டீங்க?"
"நீங்க தான சொன்னீங்க"
"அதுக்காக இப்பிடியா...சாரி மேடம்"
பீமசேனி ஒரு குட்டிப் பையனைப் பிடித்தவாறே, "பீ கேர்புல் " என்று விட்டுப் போனாள்.
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ஏகாம்பரம் அயர்ச்சியுடன் உட்கார்ந்திருந்தார். செடிக்கெல்லாம் அப்போது தான் தண்ணீர் விட்டு முடித்திருந்தார். தூரத்தில் எல்.கே.ஜி குழந்தைகள் வகுப்பறையில் இருந்து வருவது தெரிந்தது. எல்லாம் ஒவ்வொரு திசையில் ஓடின. டீச்சர் ஆடு மேய்ப்பது போல அவற்றை மேய்த்துக் கொண்டு வந்தாள்.
சற்று நேரம் கண்ணை மூடினார் ஏகாம்பரம்.
யாரோ உலுக்கி எழுப்பினார்கள். பார்த்தால் அந்த டீச்சர்.
"கொஞ்சம் கூட வாங்க", என்றாள்.
பக்கத்தில் ஒரு அடி பம்பு இருந்தது. கீழே இரண்டு சிறுவர்கள் நின்றார்கள். டீச்சர் மளமளவென்று ஒரு பையன் டிரவுசரை அவிழ்த்தாள்.
"பம்ப அடிங்க", என்று அதட்டினாள்.
ஏகாம்பரம் பம்பை அடிக்கத் தொடங்கினார்.
திடீரென்று தூரத்தில் அலறல் கேட்டது. மற்ற பிள்ளைகள் அங்குமிங்கும் ஓடினார்கள். டீச்சர் "கழுவிருங்க" என்று விட்டு அந்தப் பிசாசுகளைப் பிடிக்க ஓடினாள்.
ஏகாம்பரம் குனிந்து பார்த்தார். டிரவுசரைக் கையில் வைத்துக் கொண்டு இரண்டு குழந்தைகளும் அவரைப் பார்த்து இளித்தன.

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மிகவும் அலுப்புடன் மதிய உணவு நேரத்தில் மெதுவாகக் கிளம்பிப் பயாலஜி லேபரேட்டரிக்குப் போனார். சில பையன்கள் அறையில் இருந்தார்கள். தயக்கத்துடன் உள்ளே போய் எலும்புக்கூடு முன்னாள் நின்றார்.
இதைப் பார்த்தா பயந்தோம்? சாதுவாக இருந்தது அது. யாருடையதோ? யார் பெற்ற பிள்ளையோ? உயரமாக இருந்தது.
ஒரு காலத்தில் சொல்வார்கள். எந்தப் பேயை வேண்டுமானாலும் நம்பலாம். கொள்ளி வாய்ப் பிசாசோ, ரத்தக் காட்டேரியோ, குட்டிச் சாத்தானோ - எல்லாவற்றையும் நம்பலாம். மோகினியைத் தவிர. இரவில் நடந்து போகும் போது பின்னாலிருந்து வெற்றிலை கேட்குமாம் மோகினி. கத்தியில் சுண்ணாம்பு தடவிக் கொடுத்தால் ஓடி விடும். இல்லையோ..தொலைந்தோம்.
அவர் திரும்பிப் பார்க்கும் போது சுற்றி நாலைந்து மாணவர்கள் நின்றார்கள். அவர்களும் எலும்புக்கூட்டைப் பார்த்தார்கள்.
"பழைய வாட்ச்மேன் தான் இது", என்றான் ஒரு பையன்.
எல்லோரும் சிரித்தார்கள்.
"பார்த்தா நம்ப தணிகை மாதிரி இருக்குல்ல?" என்றான் மற்றொருவன்.
தணிகை என்ற பையன்,"இல்ல..உங்க அப்பா மாதிரி இருக்கு", என்றான்.
"ஏய் மரியாதையாப் பேசு" என்றான் முதலில் பேசியவன்.
"தம்பிங்களா.." என்று தொடங்கினார் ஏகாம்பரம்.
அவர் திரும்பி பார்க்கும் போது அடிதடி ஆரம்பமாகி விட்டது. இரண்டு பேர் மடமட வென்று அடித்துக் கொண்டார்கள். பிறகு கட்டிப் புரண்டார்கள்.
ஏகாம்பரம் பயத்துடன், " தம்பி நிறுத்துங்கப்பா", என்றார்.
மற்ற மாணவர்கள் கிரிக்கெட் பார்ப்பது போலப் பார்த்துக் கொண்டிருந்தார்கள்.
ஏகாம்பரம் இருவரையும் விலக்கி விட முயற்சி செய்தார். பார்த்தால் அவர் மேலேயே இரண்டு அடி விழுந்தது. கடைசியில் ஒரு பையன் அவரைப் பிடித்துத் தள்ளினான்.
ஏகாம்பரம் "அம்மாடி", என்று தரையில் போய் விழுந்தார்.
எலும்புக்கூடு அவர் தலைக்கு மேல் அவரைப் பார்த்துச் சிரிப்பது போலிருந்தது.

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தலைமை ஆசிரியை ஆதரவுடன் ஏகாம்பரத்தைப் பார்த்தாள். அவர் கையில் விரல் மடங்கிச் சிறு கட்டுப் போட்டிருந்தார்.
"நைட்டு ஷிஃப்டே வரீங்கள?" என்றாள்.
"ஆமாம்மா"
"எனக்கே சில சமயம் இங்க இருந்து ஓடிப் போயிடலாம் போலத் தான் இருக்கு", என்றாள்.
ஏகாம்பரம் மெதுவாக வீட்டிற்குக் கிளம்பினார். இரவு பேய்களின் நினைவு வரும். அது சற்று ஆறுதலாகக் கூட இருக்கும்.

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Don't forget to read the following:

Tamil short story - 1 - ஒரே ஒரு ஜோக்
Tamil short story - 2 - பெண் விடுதலை வேண்டும்

Translation for Tamil short story - 2 - A very brief discussion of women's liberation

Are Indians system-blind?

(Updated below) Update II
This is going to be a long post.
Let me mention a few incidents:
1.In Vijay TV talk show Neeya Naana, they were discussing government staff behavior in the passport office. A lady said that the staff are very rude and abuse public all the time. The host Gopinath said that Indians accuse Indian government staff of rudness; but will stand in line silently if they are abroad. I have heard this before - that the same public who drive badly and are impatient in India, will behave well and be patient abroad.
Gopinath was implying that the public were to blame for this - that we have two standards of behavior.
But, if Indians behave well abroad and not so well in India, does it mean that something is wrong with Indians? Or does it mean that something is wrong with India?

2. In every campus interview students ask a standard question - why is your company not creating products for India? Why are you in IT services business? Why are you not serving India? This common complaint is asked in different ways by many people.
The assumption is that the way Indian companies behave has something to do with the NATURE of the business owners (they are not sufficiently patriotic).
It does not seem to occur to anyone that if companies all the time rush towards IT services, it must be because the commerce system is PUSHING them in that direction. That is, a set of tariff laws, calculations of profit margin and the way international capital is mobile, pushes IT companies in India to operate in a certain business model. It has nothing to do with the NATURE or personality of business owners.

3. A few days back, I was having a conversation with a friend of mine - he operates an electronic dealership. He mentioned that his staff keeps switching jobs; and that they expect a payscale in parallel with IT industry payscales. He thought this was because of the "attitude" of Indian labor. He said they were too arrogant and expected the moon.
I explained to him that if labor expected a suddenly increased payscale, it was because we have an IT industry that operates on very good margins and is on a boom cycle. Since this industry is in booming in the same city, It is easy for employees to learn software programming from some training centres and quickly double their salaries. That is, labor was being pushed towards IT because of the inflow of IT business to India. That meant that employers like my friend were facing the same pressure from the market.
That is, it was not the "attitude" of Indian employees that needs to be blamed - there is a perfect systematic reason for that "attitude".

In each of the above examples, and in many other scenarios, Indian opinion seems to tend towards blaming people and attitudes than the interacting systems that operate on people and cause certain behavior. It seems, as a whole, Indians are system-blind.

System Blindness and the Indian Psyche
Sudhir Kakar, in his landmark work, "The Inner World", linking anthropology and Indian psychology, says this:

Hindus share the belief that the legitimacy of social institutions lies in the dharma they incorporate rather than in utilitarian contractual agreements and obligations. ....
Moreover, it is generally believed that social conflict, oppression and unrest do not stem from the organization of social relations, but originate in the adharma (not dharma) of those in positions of power. Institutions in India are thus personalized to an extent inconceivable in the West; individuals who head them are believed to be the sole repository of the virtues and vices of the institutions. ....
Many are the poignant stories of simple farmers in the early days of British rule who responded to an act of injustice by government officials by spending their all in the vain hope of reaching the Queen and gaining her ear, at Windsor.
Any tendency towards social reform in India moves not to abolish hierarchical institutions or to reject the values on which they are based, but to remove or "change" the individuals in positions of authority in them. When an institution is not working, it is taken for granted that the power-wielders have veered from the path of dharma.

The quote talks about Hindu world view, but applies to Indians as a whole (because it is a cultural than a religious world view).
So, when faced with some social structure that is broken, or when faced with a certain group of individuals who behave a certain way, as Indians, our first tendency is to blame the individuals themselves than look for systematic reasons for such behavior.
This explains each one of the items I described above. It also explains why, when faced with a broken system like our incredibly bad driving in Indian roads, we look to blame the drivers themselves, rather than look for systematic reasons why people drive badly.

System-blindness in Driving
In the case of driving, we can see that the Regional Transport Offices (RTO) are not monitoring driving schools closely, nor are they applying very strict criteria for proof of learning from the public. We learn to drive mainly from an utility point of view and do not learn that driving has a social dimension. This fault squarely falls on the RTOs. Note that I am not saying that RTOs give licenses to wrong people - almost anyone can learn responsible driving, provided there is someone to teach them and there is time to learn.
The other side of this equation is the regulatory system - we do not have enough traffio police and the police available are overworked. They also tend towards corruption.
Instead what are the consequences of blaming the individuals who drive in our roads, and not looking at systemic reasons?

The Consequences of System-Blindness
Most of the time, blaming individuals means that we can never correct the situation - unless everyone in India becomes a saint, we cannot have a good society. Thus, right away, we have blocked an effort to correct the situation.
Secondly, blaming individuals all the time,means we OVEREMPHASIZE punishment for deviation from our laws - but not enough emphasis is placed on learning. As we saw in the above example, the learning angle of RTOs is entirely lost - we instead concentrate exclusively on regulation by Traffic police.
Thirdly, blaming individuals in the Indian context implies a kind of self-loathing. Most of us must be familiar with this - when you blame a politician (as I did in my post on Rahul Gandhi and the Mumbai Attacks), the instant response is that we have to blame ourselves (one of the comments says that).
I think we are all familiar with this pattern - when Ramalinga Raju was arrested, rediff published an "open letter" from some moron, (the article is here) - in which the guy compared Ramalinga Raju's crimes with people who were not swiping ID cards properly at Satyam. The article ended up saying we all have ourselves to blame.
After the current spate of attacks on Indians in Australia, Outlook has published a highly confused feature article saying "Aren't we racists too?".
The tendency is to spread blame around so generally that we cannot take any action to correct anything.
This "blame ourselves" cry usually comes because people do not differentiate actual crimes against the law from individual moral issues. But it also happens because people fail to realize the interlocking systems we live in and instead focus on individual behavior.

An Example of System Blindness - Indian Politics
One example of system blindness caused the exclusive focus on voting in last parliamentary elections.
There were heavy drives in the English media to go out and vote. Aamir Khan spoke about the importance of voting. When just 45% of Mumbai voted, there were castigations of the public.
What is the logic behind such focus on voting? The prevailing idea, as explained by the movie "Yuva" ("Aayutha Ezhuthu" in Tamil) is this: if we distinguish between good and bad politicians and elect only candidates based on "merit" then we can change the system.
I have a fundamental issue with this idea - it assumes that the current crop of politicians are bad. It thus blames our ills on a group of people's nature.
Most of our politcians are well educated - some of them are lawyers. Do we know if the constituencies of such ostensibly "good" candidates are well developed?
The answer is, of course, that there seems to be uniform ineffectiveness from our legislature, irrespective of the education or sincerity of the representatives.
Why is that?
Secondly, it is close to impossible to fight an entrenched political party's candidate. We think it is possible if everyone votes for the "good" candidate. But it is not easy to figure out a good candidate for anyone. This whole idea may have worked if we were in a community of a hundred people. It will not work in the current scenario.
So, let us take a step back and see what is wrong with the election system:
1. Political parties have zero inner party democracy and have managed to circumvent such democracy requirements. It should be upto political parties to figure out the good candidate - not just the general public.
2. The election process SHOULD FORCE public financing for campaigns - that is the only way to level the playing field so that entrenched parties do not dominate.

Both of the above are NOT going to be solved just by voting. It requires a campaign to change the system. Thus, it is neither the public's fault that we elect "bad" candidates not is it the politicians' fault that they are ineffective. We need to change certain aspects of the political system for any meaningful change.

Why are We System-Blind?
From the reason for Indian IT's focus on services to the emergence of South India as an IT destination to the collapse of Indian sports in the Olympics, everything can generally be explained by looking for systemic faults.
But in this article I seem to be blaming Indians in general for system-blindness - isn't that itself wrong?
There are certain reasons for our overlooking systemic faults. These are:
1. We are a conservative society, till now. One of the hallmarks of a conservative society is assigning blame to individuals for systemic issues. It is a way of looking at the world.
When the current credit crisis started in the United States, American conservatives explained the crisis by blaming it on black and Hispanic households, who could not repay housing loans. That is, they blamed the minorities for overreaching and being greedy.
On the other hand, liberals, who looked at the same crisis, explained it by tracing it from the credit default swap mechanism initiated back in 2000. They linked it to the complex derivative trading rules in Wall Street and even on the way compensation packages worked in the finance industry.
You see the difference? Conservatives blamed individual "attitudes" and liberals blamed ceratin features of the system.
In India, we, as a conservative society, blame individuals more than systems.

2. The second is the cultural reason that I quoted earlier in the article (from Sudhir Kakar). The way the concept of dharma works in Indian society, we are tuned to see individuals operating in dharmic or adharmic mode than systems that offer incentives or disincentives.

There are perfectly rational explanations for the reasons we focus on indviduals - but it is a weakness in our society.
One of the ways to change this focus will be through education. In the long run, if we guide our educational systems towards civic lessons and explain the interlocking economic and political systems that govern us,then we can expect future generations not to play the "blame ourselves" game.
Implementing the 30-year old recommendations of the Police Commission Report or Education Commission report; and cleaning up campaign financing will go longer to establish a sane society.

Update I
When I talk about a "system", I am talking about a set of procedures, laws and other mechanisms that offer incentives and disincentives for people to behave in certain ways. Such an idea of a system is used by economists all the time. The market is one such system. These incentives and disincentives need careful consideration and are not obvious all the time.
A few years back a law was introduced to make Rape punishable by death. Women's activists objected to this law. At first sight, it seems like they should support it because the law would act as a deterrent against rape and hopefully reduce it.
But there is a hidden effect of such a law - it means that a rapist is more likely to kill his victim for fear of exposure. This is the reason why women's groups objected to this law.
Almost all the time, we ARE operating under a set of interlocking systems. We are just blind to this process. I am NOT talking about creating a NEW system, or even a SINGLE system.
Many times what we require are policy tunings to get a desired behavior. Those policy tunings in the public sphere can be effective only if we understand what is being done.
The National Police Comission report was released 30 years back. It talks about separating the state police departments from under the state government (and thus, the ruling party). It talks about creating a separate governing body (like the US Department of Justice). One of the recommendations is that the governing body be a council involving a couple of Opposition party members and retired judges.
Such a tuning would have effectively prevented the abuses we see now from ruling parties. It is obvious, in Tamil Nadu, that Jayalalitha's dragging Karunanidhi from his home at midnight would never have happened if the police was under a separate governing body.
This is what I mean by a systemic knowledge. There is so much analysis done in television and the media during election time; it all focusses on personalities. If going out to vote is important, I think agitating for the implementation of the Police Commission report is more important and will change the system faster.

Update II
One of the main reasons to emphasize systems is that the alternative explanation - that Indian middle class is bad is just a cop-out. That just avoids argument. The explanation is also contrary to common sense - why should Indians behave well abroad and not in India? Further, why do we think that Indians are somehow uniquely corrupt?
It makes more sense that we behave the way we do and our politicians and businesses behave a certain way because that is the way incentives lie.

Being Ultra Rich

The question that has been bothering me for the past few years is this: how can I become ultra-Rich?
To address this, you first have to understand if you are rich or not. The India Together Editor Ashwin Mahesh did some back-of-the-envelope calculations a few years back and wrote that you are rich in India if you have more than Rs.10000 as income per month.
This will be shocking to most people, because we call most people in that range as middle class; actually we call them lower middle class. We definitely did not consider ourselves rich when we were earning Rs.10000 per month.
But in India, the average wage is much lower than Rs.10000 per month. So most of us reading and writing in the internet are already Rich.
But there is an important reason why we do not consider ourselves rich - that is because, we still have to struggle for recognition with millions of other people. So we are Rich, but we do not get some of the SOCIAL benefits of being rich. We are not Unique.

The New Rich

You see, there are two kinds of rich people - we call in Tamil "Pudhu Panakkaaran" - the New Rich and "Paramparai Panakkaran" - the Traditional Rich.
Most of us are the New Rich - I started out with a pay of Rs.2500 in my first job and then reached Nirvana only because I went to the USA. The New Rich people have some money, and want to be respected as Rich. But we still have a long way to go.
How do you know the New Rich? We are the ones hanging out in Pizza Corner, Coffee Day, Barrista, LandMark, Odyssey and all these shops. There is a very very important way these shops are distinguished - in these shops, all the staff talk in English. They have "English" music going - never ordinary Tamil, Hindi movie songs.
You see, the New Rich are trying hard to show that they are Rich; they do this in a variety of ways. One of these ways is to make you feel you are "foreign".
I was browsing books in Odyssey the other day when a staff member walked over and said, "Do you need any help?". I said "No". The guy replied, as a single word, "Looking-for-nothing-in-particular" and walked away. It took me about five minutes to figure out what he said.
So, these shops, the New Rich shops provide an important function in society - they are there essentially for validating that you are, indeed, a Rich guy. They try to make you feel exclusive in a country with a hundred million other people exactly like you.
The staff there know this - they are so uncomfortable with their role, though.
This was brought home to me last week in Barrista. The guy at the cash register frowned at every one of his customers. A family came in and ordered coffee. The guy harassed them with all the stupid questions about coffee - latte, cream on top and all that. The couple gamely answered all the questions, but still could not get RESPECT from the register guy. So, they started complaining that the prices were higher than in the USA and tried to talk about the USA - for the sole purpose of informing the guy they were NRIs. That did not help either. The guy never stopped barking at them.
I was nervously waiting for my turn. I started out asking for coffee in Tamil, asked him a couple of questions about seating upstairs. The problem I have is that I find it difficult to talk in English with other Tamils - it is just not natural.I asked all my questions in Tamil, and the guy probably got offended. He resolutely kept answering in English. Finally I gave up.
When I thought about it later, I realized that all of us customers at Barrista are competing for some respect or distinction because we are the New Rich. Unfortunately, the staff there are aware of that. They know that they hold the power to make or break our Rich egos. So, they exercise that power.
I always find tense, morose staff at Coffee Day, Odyssey and Pizza Corner. The reason is not far to seek - the staff is forced to behave in a cultural context outside of their regular experience. It is somewhat like BPO.

The Ultra-Rich

But how can you truly distinguish yourself in Chennai?
You have to be one of the Ultra Rich traditional panakaarans.
Have you ever walked into the Taj in Chennai? Or Park Sheraton? You talk to them in Tamil, they would reply in Tamil. Right there is a clue of why they are so cool.
We have to realize that there is an unassuming tradition of richness, native to India.
When I was growing up in Tirunelveli, there was a family friend of ours. He would turn up at our home without wearing a chappal, covered in Neem oil and sit by the shoe rack and converse with my dad. Well, he was on the Board of Directors for the Ramco group and owned half the village of Kayathaar.
Again, there was the owner of a private bus transport. This guy would wear a cotton dhoti and white shirt. He would have a "thundu" (towel) bunched up in his hand wherever he went. The guy was a multi millionaire - he owned 10 buses in the Tirunelveli area and was a philanthropist. He donated the gold statue of Thyagaraja currently in Thiruvaiyaaru.
I saw the leader of the TN Congress Party and national King Maker, G.K.Mooppanaar once in Tirunelveli. He was simple as well, although he landed up in a fleet of Benz cars.
There is a tradition of extreme humility (matched many times by conservative ideas) in Indian Ultra-Rich world. Political leaders, Cinema luminaries, Industrialists - many of them operate in a constellation far above ours.
Well, you think they go to Coffee Day? I bet even their grand children don't. They have no need for validation. They are so damn cool, they can walk into the Taj and order curd rice. They are so damn cool, their women do not go to Nalli. Nalli chettiyaar personally delivers hand-designed sarees to their womenfolk.
Right now, I can count a few of these rich families:
1. M.Karunanidhi, Stalin, Maran family
2. Rajinikanth family
3. Saravana Stores family
4. S.Ve Sekhar family
5. Y.G. Parthasarathy family
6. Kamal Hassan-Charu Hassan-Chandra Hassan family
7. Saravana Bhavan family
8. Nalli family
9. AVM family
10. DK Pattammal (Nithyasree) family
11. Sivaji Ganesan family

There are probably hundreds of them, but not thousands. Most of these men and women are recognized only by the others in this exclusive club.

My Ultra-Rich Fantasy

I have a fantasy about belonging to this club.
In my fantasy, housemaids and gardeners and drivers abound in our home - none of them ever quit. Even if they do, I do not have to personally worry about finding their replacement.
In my fantasy, the hall in the house is enormous; has two staircases going round - like the houses in old Sivaji, MGR movies.
In my fantasy, the driver drives me and my wife upto Vummidi Bangaru Jewellers (VBJ) and parks in the back. Someone goes in and informs the manager. They come running out. My wife gets samples delivered to the car. Meanwhile I am munching fried cashewnuts and contemplating the expansion of my immense business house.
In my fantasy, I don't talk much.
In my fantasy, I buy Barrista and Odyssey.

Ok, the cooker whistle is going like a siren, I got to go.

Translation for Tamil short story 2

I don't like to translate my Tamil stories, for a good reason. I tried writing some English short stories at one point, long back, and they all came out stilted and artificial. I am fluent in the English language, but I seem to write stories better in Tamil, and articles better in English.
But a couple of people have asked for translations to the two stories in this blog. Here is a translation for the second story, linked here.

A very brief discussion on women's liberation
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By, Ramiah Ariya

Raghu looked at his watch. His friends at work were visiting for the first time. He was excited about the visit.
Along with his wife, Prema, he had tried to find a movie to watch for the evening. They had succeeded in settling on a "family" movie finally. Still, it had an "item" number.
"When they arrive, you don't have to take the women in and discuss sarees and jewelry," said Raghu.
"Don't bother about what we discuss", said Prema.
"Why don't you discuss something useful?"
"Why? You think guys have an intellectual conversation?" asked Prema.
"There are so many subjects - the country is going to the dogs; society is corrupt. I like to talk about something useful", said Raghu.
"You only end up fighting when you discuss such topics", said Prema.
"No. We won't. We will manage an illuminating conversation, so even you will be interested", said Raghu.

After the movie was over, there was a brief silence. Raghu decided to initiate a meaningful, stimulating discussion.
"What do you think of women going to work, as they do in this movie?" he asked.
The men glared at him. The women looked at their husbands for a reply.
"I love watching Vadivelu getting beaten up", said Varun.
"I know..it never gets old", said Gandhi.
"Why don't you answer his question?" said Varun's wife.
"What question?"
Raghu repeated his question.
"Oh yeah...hmmmm...nothing wrong with it if they have talent", said Gandhi.
"I am sure you have lots of 'talent'.." said his wife.
"Historically, they usually say that the man is for work and the woman is meant to be at home.." said Gandhi.
"Who said that? Nobody said that...do you know the guy who said it?"
Gandhi said, "I am sure Varun knows that guy. Leave me alone".

Raghu wanted to steer the discussion to be more fruitful. He said, "So as long as the woman is talented, you are fine with it?"
"First of all why are you questioning me? Why don't you answer your own question? Is it right or wrong for women to work?"
Raghu decided this was a God-given opportunity to talk for the next half hour and showcase his deep intellect.
"According to the United Nations, women constitute fifty percent of the world's population. But they perform seventy five percent of the work"
"Who? My wife?" asked Varun
"Yes"
"No she doesn't"
"Let him speak", said Varun's wife.
"Alright, enough with the United Nations. How about your home?" asked Gandhi.
Prema said, "Exactly."
Raghu glared at her and said, "We should not talk about each other's homes. Statistics say that.."
Gandhi intercepted him and said, "Prema, why don't you tell us. Is Raghu supportive at home?"
"Friday evening he comes back from work and sits in front of the TV. He gets up again only on Monday morning".
Everyone laughed at this.
Gandhi said,"Yes, but what do you expect. He deals only with the United Nations.."
Raghu said, with growing irritation, "My point is, why can't women with talent work?"
"Just a second", said Gandhi's wife.
"Yeah?"
"Are you saying that women who stay at home are not talented?"
"I...I did not say that..."
"Or is it true that all of you guys who work are extremely talented?" she continued.
Raghu looked around for support.
"If you are so talented how come you don't have a car?"
The room went silent. Raghu desperately looked at Prema for help. She seemed to be laughing inside. He decided to deflect attention.
"No, I said that only because Varun said a man is meant for work"
"I did not say that...Gandhi said that".
Gandhi, cornered, said, without any reason, " I actually respect Kiran Bedi a lot".
Varun's wife said, "If we were all Kiran Bedis, you guys would not have a free run"

At this point, Prema interrupted. "Do you want to watch Friends?"
Raghu shot her an irritated look. Why did she always block his ideas from blossoming? They would start with Friends, move on to Lost and end up discussing sarees and jewelry. He had so many ideas on women's liberation. Even the women did not seem to be too interested in their own liberation.
"Shut up" he said, to Prema.
Then he turned to the others and said, "Now, would you like me to summarize all of the discussion points?"
"NO", they all yelled in chorus.
Raghu did not give up. He continued, "I wanted to cover another, very important angle of this interesting topic".
"I think we should leave", said Varun to Gandhi.
" No, hold on. As men, how can we help women achieve their objectives?"
Varun got up and said, "We will submit an essay tomorrow."
"But don't you think women suffer because of us?"
"They don't suffer as much as we do because of your speeches"
Varun's wife interceded and said, "Poor Varun does not make me suffer. He is nice"
"Did you hear that?" said Varun.

"In that case, why are we not ready to send women to work?"
Varun said, "You are lecturing all of us...why isn't Prema taking a job?"
"Oh..we should not discuss personal issues. Abstractly speaking, my hypothetical question is.."
"Prema..why don't you tell us. Why aren't you going to work?"
Raghu interrupted and said, "She attended an interview. She answered the questions wrong and they did not recruit. So, I said no after that."
"I did not answer anything wrong", said Prema.
Varun's wife said, "So, it was just one interview? Varun here attended ten different interviews and then finally we had to promise tonsuring his head for Venkatachalapathi. "
"Yes..tell that to everyone. Very mature" said Varun.
Raghu said, "No, it is not that way. I am just asking her to prepare well. If she attends interviews in all these companies and fails, I would lose my reputation."
"So you are not letting her go for the sake of your reputation?"
Raghu became confused. He said, "If there is a good opportunity, I will send her."
Gandhi's wife said, "Why do you keep saying you will 'send her'? If we get a degree after marriage, you say 'I let her go to school'. If we go to a job, 'I sent her for a job'. We can do things by ourselves."
"Ok..I will send her".
"Why are you repeating that?"
Gandhi said, "Come on Raghu. You cannot do this just because she failed a single interview. Don't keep her locked up at home".
Raghu looked around. Everyone was staring at him.

"I think it is time for watching Friends. Prema, can you switch on the tv?"

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It does seem weird reading this in English. Let me know.